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How My Heartbreak Transformed Me – Guest Post by Lux Ganzon

There are several bloggers out there who have been a huge source of encouragement and support to me over the past few years, whom I greatly admire and have looked up to for a very long time. One of these people is my friend Lux Ganzon who blogs at aboutlifeandlove.com.

Today Lux gives us a new perspective on something we all experience–heartbreak. I love Lux’s clear and heartfelt writing that feels like the warmth of a dear friend giving you gems of advice to live fully even in the hardest moments.

Make sure to check out Lux’s blog and follow her on all her socials – Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and G+.

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How My Heartbreak Transformed Me

When you’re down to nothing,
God is up to something.

How My HeartbreakTransformed Me
I’ve always read about in novels or seen in movies. It’s something my friends went through. It’s something I never thought I would go through myself.

I was careful. I made sure I wasn’t giving my all. I thought I was being cautious and wise.

But, it still happened. That thing called heartbreak. It was devastating. I didn’t see it coming. I was blindsided.

To be betrayed by someone you loved and trusted for half a decade is no joke. Even the optimistic me suddenly succumbed to a life of temporary darkness. It felt as though there was a heavy cloud constantly hovering over me.

For months (or did it last for years?) I was like a living dead. Going about my “normal” routine but not being present entirely. I was an empty shell—a broken empty shell.

I was badly broken and wounded inside. Nothing could cheer me up.

I experienced pain like never before.

What I got from it:

I used to think those who are having relationship problems are exaggerating. They’re wallowing in self-pity and are dwelling in something that’s easy and trivial. I’ve always thought heartbreak is too juvenile a thing to take seriously. Boy was I so wrong to think that.

a. Empathy

But that’s the thing about heartbreak. That’s the thing about suffering. It changes you. It transforms your very core and makes you look at things differently.

Suddenly, I understand why some people go through depression. I then understood why some people opt to commit suicide or lose their sanity. I get their pain.

I became empathetic in a deeper level.

b. Resilience

I never thought I could be this unbreakable if it were not for that painful heartbreak. I discovered that no matter how hard the wind blows, I can only bend but I will never break.

c. Grace

It was through that brokenness that God’s grace flew freely in me. It was through that pain that God’s healing was made possible. It was through those cracks in my shattered life that God’s presence seeped in my being. The heartbreak paved the way for God’s unconditional love to manifest in my life.

Transformation

I have new perspective, renewed strength and faith. I have a transformed life.

Through that heartbreak, I’ve learned how God’s love is truly new every morning. Because no matter how messed up and damaged I felt I was, every day, there were constant reminders of His love. There were constant assurances that everything that’s happening was according to His grand plan.

That heartbreak freed me from toxic people in my life and spared me from further pain and conflicts. It redirected me into the path I am ought to take in the first place.

That most painful goodbye actually was good riddance.

In the end, all is well.

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Bio:
Lux currently balances her time working on her dream business and pursuing her passion for writing; finding her one true love while building her own happily ever after; and chasing dreams as she lives in the reality of the present. Through her blog she hopes to someday leave a dent in the world. Follow her (Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and G+) to get your daily dose of good vibes.

About Sam

in love with all things Jesus, music, adventure, writing, teaching, laughter, running, friendship. Founder of recklesslyalive.com.

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14 comments

  1. Such a wonderful and inspiring post. Thank you so much for sharing. I followed the link from Lux’s blog. Warm greetings from Montreal, Canada. 🙂

  2. Ohhhh, Lux, I LOVE this post. I think it’s universal. Who among us can’t identify?

    So much love,
    Julie~~

    P.S. So nice to meet you Sam. It’s my first time to your blog, and I’ll be back!

  3. The lesson about empathy is true! Only after we have gone through someone’s painful situation can we learn to appreciate the fullness of it all. What you initially judged as trivial or exaggerated response suddenly makes sense to you and you begin to connect. Sometimes, it is necessary to not live vicariously in order to appreciate that things are real.

    This is a wonderful testimony that God can use us for his glory whatever situation we are in, even when we are in pain. God meets us wherever we need to be.

    • I know you’re one who would truly understand this more than anyone, Jayson.
      Thanks for also sharing your story on my blog. Appreciate you coming over here to read the full story.

  4. Love this! and sadly while we are going through the worst part of the heartbreak we simply cannot see these gifts that are waiting for us!

    this does a heart good!

  5. Letting go of toxic people is never easy. Great post!

  6. Great sadness can change us for the best, it really can show us how strong we really are… I like that about resilience … it’s true we bend but don’t break and we truly learn a lot about empathy xox

  7. Hello Lux

    You are a brave woman and my heart goes out to you. Where you went during that horrible time is a place that only the courageous can walk. The arrival is sudden, the journey is excruciatingly slow and your escape comes at a price.

    I love your sub heading ‘when you’re down to nothing, God is up to something’. I have been where you went and one of my take aways is “Down is up”. The further down you go the closer you get.

    It’s messy, it’s painful but at the other end – when you look back you suddenly realise that you were not alone and the relationship you held for granted is now much sweeter because you know, in the midst of that darkness, He shared your grief and defended you when you didn’t have the strength to lift a finger. An impossible love to replicate but the driving force behind change.

    I’m sorry you felt the sting but I admire and rejoice in your courage and strength that has given you the opportunity to be an overcomer.

    Hold your head up soldier – it’s not a disgrace to live with the scares of depression it’s the sign that you have a relationship stronger than most.

  8. Lux is a wonderful writer. I’ve been following her blog at http://www.aboutlifeandlove.com/ for a couple of years now. I have found her to be wise beyond her years and one who inspires me with her positive outlook. Thanks for sharing this thoughtful and encouraging post!

  9. Hi, Sam! Hi, Lux!

    I can certainly relate to this piece. As was the case with Lux, I was in a serious relationship for half a decade before it suddenly blew-up. I entered a period of darkness that lasted several months. I never knew that I could feel so much pain. Nothing gave me the least bit of joy or pleasure or relief from my agony. Yet, by turning to God and asking his help, I was able to survive day by day. Eventually the pain subsided and I was able to resume a normal life and experience happiness again.

    Thank you very much, Sam and Lux!

  10. Such a powerful and inspiring post. We all experience heartbreak at some time or another, but like you mentioned…we are not broken. Our lives are mend able. We are stronger than we think and with God we can make it through anything.