In November 2011, I gave myself a dangerous ultimatum; I decided I was going to commit suicide on December 25th or never think about it again. These thoughts had plagued me throughout high school and college and enough was enough.
When that day finally came, I sat in my bathroom with the knife and pills that could end it all when finally a voice broke through. In 100 point font in my brain were the words: have you really given life all you’ve got?
This is my story:
Since that day my life has had plenty of mountaintop moments and plenty of valleys. I’ve led worship on the plains of Zimbabwe and held sick babies in Haiti. I’ve finished a marathon, earned a Master’s Degree and am finishing my first manuscript telling my story.
In May 2016, I launched my own suicide prevention ministry sprinting towards a world with zero deaths from suicide.
I am on a mission to tell my story and get the world talking about suicide and depression. I would LOVE to talk to you about speaking to your organization, school, church, or youth group. For more information on my speaking, visit my Speaking Page here. I am also touring with musician Hunter Fraser as part of the Come Alive House Show Tour. (click that link to learn more about that or host your own show!)
My life post-suicide attempt is far from perfect. I still battle depression and still occasionally hear that old voice telling me maybe I shouldn’t exist. Nowadays I live for two magical words: For This. Two words I hear over and over again when I ask God why I survived.
You survived for this.
Please contact me any time with questions or ideas on how we can partner to help fight suicide together.