Sometimes words just demand to be said. They unexpectedly spring up inside me like the expired Kung Pao chicken I sniffed and ate anyway, intensely forcing their way out of my unsuspecting mouth. It’s often a great thing for me, the person expelling his gut, and less endearing for the victim receiving the sweet, vomit-like expression.
These words, buried deep, push their way out as they sense an opportunity window is closing or, perhaps, has passed. So many times this happens because the heart senses something that has never been spoken and is deeply longing to be said.
And then other times, the words are never released at all.
I think we all have people we’ve thrown up on and people we maybe should have. When we fall silent in those lingering relationships we’re left to wonder if the other person ever knew exactly how we felt.
After (almost) 27 years on this wild, rotating sphere of ours, I’ve learned that rarely do we fully appreciate someone until they’re gone or are leaving. I officially call this the Tuesdays With Morrie Effect: failing to recognize someone’s incredible impact until the end is near.
As a quieter person, this tends to be my style.
My most frequent unspoken offenders:
I love you.
I forgive you.
I’m learning there’s only one true anecdote to this syndrome and that is making sure the people you love and admire most know, with out a doubt, what they mean to you.
You see it’s the oldest story in the book. One day you blink and you are a senior in high school and you blink again and your twenties are almost in the rear view. Life speeds away through the busyness and the chaos and suddenly you’re staring into the slideshow of your past at dozens of amazingly broken people who are gone and aren’t coming back.
Why do I struggle so much with speaking my heart? Am I alone?
As I look around, it seems most of humanity operates this way. We fail to say our soul’s truest declarations because we’re sprinting so fast on the rat wheel of our lives, working desperately to do, achieve, and succeed that we don’t have time to stop and see that life has always been and will always be about love and speaking from the heart. So today I challenge you to ask yourself:
What words in your life go unsaid?
Who comes to mind as that person who has never heard what you’ve always meant to say?
While perhaps word vomit isn’t the most enjoyable experience for either party, I think we could actually all use a little more of it.
Don’t assume the people you love know how you feel. Tell them over and over. Never stop thanking, apologizing, forgiving, and loving them. Life is getting away from all of us and the opportunity to say what you need to say might never come again.
Will you be reckless enough to let the words come flying out or will you let another day go by, risking it will never be said at all?
Be present and alive in this moment.
Be grateful and loving to everyone
God has put in your life.
Speak up, my friend.
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